There is no escape from your life:
Solve the problems and get on with it.

by Lauren Muney

At New Year's, many retailers and service providers bombard you with ways to buy their products so you can create a "whole new you". As you know (you are very smart!) it's simply a ploy to capitalize on your "New Year's resolutions". Unfortunately, many people buy into the ploy because they think there's a miracle cure for their fitness, wellness, or life issues. (The only people who have lasting miracles are the advertisers - in their bank accounts!)

There is no miracle cure, cream, easy diet, or "no-exercise inches-loss" which the new resolutions can solve. That's the sad part... that there are no miracles. However, you still want (and deserve!) changes.

There is no escape from your life.

(See the picture of me in 1988... escaping. Look at the junk food and about 30 extra pounds.)

Fat Lauren Muney in 1988

We all try to find ways of ignoring the parts of our lives which are not working:

We continously seeking 'a diet which may work this time'.
We watch television for hours on end, but hope for fitness.
We often go to jobs we hate.
We drink, do drugs, gamble, stay away from family, or play videogames for hours, just to 'waste some time' or forget about our problems: addictive behaviors and time-wasters.

If you find yourself avoiding problems, you are probably doing some 'escaping' already.

Do the same problems come up again and again?
Do you feel like you are sinking in the problem?
Do you become more involved in a hobby, interest, addiction (eating, drinking, recreational drugs, shopping, multi-hour Internet, or any frenetic activity)?
Are you FRUSTRATED with a situation?

If you find yourself making any explanations why you can't do something - it's time to start solving. If you find yourself frustrated over and over -- it's time to start solving. But there is no escape.

The only way to end any treadmill -- be it inside your body, at work, in your home, or in your mind -- is to face the problems. Acknowledge the problems, look for solution, and get on with your life.

You already know when parts of your life are not working. Just face them - and seek change.Your life CAN get better. Your life can improve. Decide whether it's time for you to stop making excuses, fooling yourself with escapism, or listening to get-rich-quick marketers.

How do I change my life - without 'escaping'?

If something isn't working in your life, how many times do you have to try the same things over and over again, getting the same results, to realize that the path is mistaken? Change ISN'T easy, but the pain of NOT changing is even harder. Living your life in half- (or entire) misery isn't helping you either.

Learn to assess your problems... and I'll give you a clue of how you can begin.

First, you need to listen to your own excuses.

Yes, if you are like 80% of us, you have excuses for anything that is challenging, complicated, or just downright uncomfortable. Most likely, those actions are uncomfortable because you like the easy way. (Sometimes the easy way is to stay doing the same thing.)

If you have a desire to do something (lose fat, have a solutions-oriented talk with your partner, go see a doctor about a pain, clean your house, get a better job) and YOU FEEL YOURSELF MAKING 'EXPLANATIONS', these are actually your excuses. They might not seem like excuses that others give you; after all, they are YOURS - and you don't make excuses... or do you?

It's time to listen to your own explanations, your own excuses, and decide how to work around those issues. Remember to give yourself credit for being COURAGEOUS. It takes time and patience to see your own frustrations, and to hear your own excuses, but being in tune with yourself is what you need RIGHT NOW. There's a quote I love: "Do it the hard way, it's easier".

So what have you been running away from?

Do you make excuses (to yourself or others) about your fitness or health? Are you frustrated about how you look or how you feel?
Are you frustrated about your job (or career)? Do you have problems with co-workers, commuting distance, job requirements, high-pressure situations, and other business duties? Do you feel stuck without escape?
Are you uncomfortable in your home surroundings? Do you like where you live or feel peaceful inside the home? Do you enjoy being away, so you don't have to be inside your home?
Do you frequently feel discomfort in your relationships? Do you spend time seeking ways to avoid interactions, discussions, or even presence of certain people in your life, especially family members?

These are just a few examples of discomfort in our lives. If any of these struck a nerve, it's important that you know that you can feel better... immediately, by doing one important thing:

Acknowledge that these issues are causing you frustration and that you need to take action right now.

Begin realizing where you are uncomfortable - and start listing opportunities for change in your 'frustration areas'.

This may sound like a lot of work... and perhaps it is. But there are more tears in what you've been 'tolerating' than what you need to do to begin your new life. There is always a way to renew your circumstances.

Make your life extraordinary.

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'Facing your life' does not guarantee that you won't have problems ever again. Life is full of challenges because living is complicated. However, wouldn't it feel wonderful to feel able to calmly handle any challenge, and to know that there is no obstacle you cannot surmount? The techniques about frustration-assessment and problem-solving will help you through any issue at any time.